I was only in college for a year. I went to college the next semester out of high school, but my mental health was struggling a lot. After my first semester, I was put on academic probation. I skipped classes and struggled to turn in any of my assignments on time, some I just never turned in. Before the spring semester started, my parents sat me down and asked if I really wanted to try again. I was bent on doing better and proving I could improve my grades. It wasn’t until a few weeks into the semester that I realized I just couldn’t do it anymore and needed to drop out; however, I was told I needed to finish what I started and at least finish out the semester. As soon as we entered spring break is when COVID really hit. I was stuck at home helping my parents spruce up the place so they could sell it while trying my best to do something before just flunking out completely. I had felt very lost at first, but now that I can look back at it, I’m glad I did.
I was stuck in a rut for a couple of years just working full time at a fast food place and playing video games to pass the time. My mental health was still really bad until I finally moved out in late 2021 with my now girlfriend and her family. She pushed me to get back into therapy and take better care of myself. I ended up going to the mental hospital for 10 days where I got my first case of COVID. She sat with me in the ER for about eight hours while they found a place for me to go so I wouldn’t be alone. Eventually, after lots of therapy and medication, I ended up finding the will to live and got a tattoo to cover my old scars and remind myself of my struggles.
Finally, we ended up getting our own apartment and that’s when we started dating. I ended up having to work two jobs so my girlfriend and her sister could finish school. It was rough working so many hours for an entire semester. I worked fast food in the morning and respite care for a family after the kid got off of school. Once my girlfriend graduated college and started working full time, I switched to only working with the family. Life has gotten a lot easier for me and while I still have a long way to go in my battle with my mental health, I’m much better than I was when I was in school. I’ve finally gotten myself to a good enough place I feel ready to possibly go back to school. I’ve also been making slow but steady progress in starting my writing career.
I’m very excited to see where life takes me. If I didn’t fail or leave home, I wouldn’t be the woman I am today. I found a system that works for me and a job that allows me to focus on my dreams and passions while also providing enough money to pay my bills. I have a wonderful girlfriend who understands and appreciates me who I plan to marry next summer if life goes right. Yes, I’ve struggled a lot to get here, but I love where I am now and I wouldn’t change my past for anything.
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